Seize the day! That was the motto of my high school, Earl Haig in Willowdale. When I watched the movie, Dead Poets’ Society, it was there, too.
I wish I had known just what Carpe Diem meant long ago. Yes, I knew that it meant seize the day, but I didn’t know how to put it into practice. It was something that I saw on the logo and heard in our school song.
There were too many times in my life when I was young when opportunity stared me in the face and I looked the other way.
Don’t get me wrong. My life hasn’t turned out too badly, but I am sad when I think of some of the might have beens and how a few more wonderful experiences might have added to the many I have already had.
A good example of my not seizing the day was the frosh picnic at Ryerson. Some people in my class tried to persuade me to attend. This was back in 1972. I found every excuse not to go. I felt that the band that was playing at this event was dumb. Who would name a band The Chicago Transit Authority and have a record called 25 to 6 to 4? How wrong I was. The Chicago Transit Authority eventually became the band called Chicago. I could have seen them up close for free.
Why didn’t I go? Fear of the unknown.
Fortunately I have gotten over a lot of that fear, although it still creeps back from time to time.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
6.6 Billion People
That is how many people are on the earth – 6.6 billion. One third of them are in two countries, India and China.
When I look at this figure I wonder about my place in the whole scheme of things. I look at some people who have touched the lives of so many and I wonder how I can do the same.
Then I realize that my role may not be to touch the life of a great number. It may be only to be important to a few. In fact, nobody has the ability to reach everyone.
There is a feature in the magazine for our teachers’ federation. It asks a prominent Canadian who his favourite teacher was. While I may know the personality, I don’t know the teacher.
Not all of us are destined to influence the masses. That doesn’t mean that our contributions are meaningless. Even if we can make the life of one person better then it is all worth it. Who knows? Maybe that one person we are kind towards will be the one who will be important to many.
Make it a goal to do something nice to somebody every day. If everybody did this, wouldn’t the world be a better place? You can help start the revolution.
As the saying goes: “You may not be somebody to the world, but you may be the world to somebody.”
When I look at this figure I wonder about my place in the whole scheme of things. I look at some people who have touched the lives of so many and I wonder how I can do the same.
Then I realize that my role may not be to touch the life of a great number. It may be only to be important to a few. In fact, nobody has the ability to reach everyone.
There is a feature in the magazine for our teachers’ federation. It asks a prominent Canadian who his favourite teacher was. While I may know the personality, I don’t know the teacher.
Not all of us are destined to influence the masses. That doesn’t mean that our contributions are meaningless. Even if we can make the life of one person better then it is all worth it. Who knows? Maybe that one person we are kind towards will be the one who will be important to many.
Make it a goal to do something nice to somebody every day. If everybody did this, wouldn’t the world be a better place? You can help start the revolution.
As the saying goes: “You may not be somebody to the world, but you may be the world to somebody.”
Monday, April 28, 2008
Idea Killers
They lurk at every meeting. Usually they are not very productive people. They feel their sole purpose is to kill every idea that comes forward. They are poison.
I am known as a man who has many ideas on all things. Some are downright silly; others are brilliant. When I present an idea to a group, it has usually been well thought out.
Then it happens. Somebody asserts his or her authority and tells everyone why something can’t be done. They launch the torpedo and another good idea bites the dust.
Recently I realized something I never though of before. I don’t need these negative people. I already know why something may fail. The types of people I want around me are people who will figure out how to make something succeed.
I have no problem with somebody taking one of my ideas and making it better. I admire people like this. What I don’t like are people who delight in finding the flaw to kill something.
Next time I am confronted with one of these nay-sayers, I am going to ask him, “How do we make it work?”
Just think where we would be today if these mandrakes of doubt had won every battle. Fortunately, there have been people in this world who have pressed on in spite of what others have said. They have believed in their dream and did what it took to make it happen.
Both approaches change an idea. One drags it down to its death. The other lifts it up to its full potential. Surround yourself with the latter and I believe you and I will be on the road to success.
I am known as a man who has many ideas on all things. Some are downright silly; others are brilliant. When I present an idea to a group, it has usually been well thought out.
Then it happens. Somebody asserts his or her authority and tells everyone why something can’t be done. They launch the torpedo and another good idea bites the dust.
Recently I realized something I never though of before. I don’t need these negative people. I already know why something may fail. The types of people I want around me are people who will figure out how to make something succeed.
I have no problem with somebody taking one of my ideas and making it better. I admire people like this. What I don’t like are people who delight in finding the flaw to kill something.
Next time I am confronted with one of these nay-sayers, I am going to ask him, “How do we make it work?”
Just think where we would be today if these mandrakes of doubt had won every battle. Fortunately, there have been people in this world who have pressed on in spite of what others have said. They have believed in their dream and did what it took to make it happen.
Both approaches change an idea. One drags it down to its death. The other lifts it up to its full potential. Surround yourself with the latter and I believe you and I will be on the road to success.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
My Family
When I was younger, life was difficult living in a small house with eight children. At one time, my sister added to the mob by contributing her husband and two infants. Something was always happening in our home.
Things were different. Part of it was the era we lived in; the rest was just the way it was in our household.
We never locked our doors. It wasn’t until I moved to Kitchener from Toronto that I had keys to my mother’s home. There wasn’t any need for security. If the place was ever empty, which was seldom, it would be long before somebody came along. Anyway, we didn’t have anything that anyone would consider stealing.
Like many families in the 50s, Saturday night was bath night. One tub was drawn for the young ones and they all took turns using the same water. Not only that, I don’t remember having my own towel or washcloth until most of my brothers and sisters had moved out. I shudder at the germs that must have been transmitted, especially when I wonder now where that washcloth might have been before I washed my face. We didn’t seem to get sick, though.
I tried inviting friends over after school. It didn’t work out very well. Usually fights broke out and I would get embarrassed.
My mother was the focal point of the whole family. Then she died. I remember talking with a sister on how the family would stay together without her being the glue to make us stick.
It’s funny how things work out. As we have moved on to our own lives, our family had gotten stronger and stronger. We are closer than we ever have. I realized that this weekend.
One brother died nine years or so ago, but most of us try to get together two or three times a year.
This past weekend, we got together for dinner and a play in St. Marys. Then, we went out for breakfast this morning.
I have come to realize that my family is important to me. I have also understand that the relationship we have with each other is something special. Few families experience this. The common experience we shared as children is part of the cord that binds us together. We understand and accept each other. We also have learned to enjoy each other’s company.
I wouldn’t trade my family for the world. Everyone is so special to me.
Things were different. Part of it was the era we lived in; the rest was just the way it was in our household.
We never locked our doors. It wasn’t until I moved to Kitchener from Toronto that I had keys to my mother’s home. There wasn’t any need for security. If the place was ever empty, which was seldom, it would be long before somebody came along. Anyway, we didn’t have anything that anyone would consider stealing.
Like many families in the 50s, Saturday night was bath night. One tub was drawn for the young ones and they all took turns using the same water. Not only that, I don’t remember having my own towel or washcloth until most of my brothers and sisters had moved out. I shudder at the germs that must have been transmitted, especially when I wonder now where that washcloth might have been before I washed my face. We didn’t seem to get sick, though.
I tried inviting friends over after school. It didn’t work out very well. Usually fights broke out and I would get embarrassed.
My mother was the focal point of the whole family. Then she died. I remember talking with a sister on how the family would stay together without her being the glue to make us stick.
It’s funny how things work out. As we have moved on to our own lives, our family had gotten stronger and stronger. We are closer than we ever have. I realized that this weekend.
One brother died nine years or so ago, but most of us try to get together two or three times a year.
This past weekend, we got together for dinner and a play in St. Marys. Then, we went out for breakfast this morning.
I have come to realize that my family is important to me. I have also understand that the relationship we have with each other is something special. Few families experience this. The common experience we shared as children is part of the cord that binds us together. We understand and accept each other. We also have learned to enjoy each other’s company.
I wouldn’t trade my family for the world. Everyone is so special to me.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Caleigh and Ollie
I didn’t want another dog. Losing a dog as precious as Sarah left me not wanting the emotional commitment our canine friends create in our lives.
Marie had other ideas. She felt that a home was not a home without a dog. It was an argument that she would win.
One thing we did agree on was that any dog we bring into this home will be one we rescue. We will never buy a dog from a breeder.
Marie started combing the Internet and found Caleigh (on the right in the photo). She had been dumped in a farmer’s field near Goderich, Ontario.
When we first saw her, she was a puppy with energy to spare. She had so much that we almost returned her two times.
On the first occasion, she got out of her cage when we weren’t home. We returned to shredded newspaper and a path toilet paper spread like carpet from room to room.
The next time was when she had caught and eaten a wild rabbit. She started vomiting the intestines on our living room rug. I felt like a magician pulling endless handkerchiefs from his sleeve as I pulled the endless cord from her mouth. Since we have a cat, my concern is that our feline would suffer the same fate as the rabbit.
For some reason, I was always unable to return Caleigh. She would always come and cuddle with me, begging for forgiveness.
Ollie, the one on the left, was found wandering the streets of Albion, Michigan. He was taken to the local veterinarian with mange on his face to be put down. My wife’s niece saw something in this young lad and nursed him back to health. He also had lots of energy.
Joanne, my wife’s sister, got the brilliant idea that if the two dogs got together they might tire each other. She brought Ollie to meet Caleigh and they were instant friends. Merrily they chased each other around our yard and tired each other out. The plan worked!
Today they are healthy, happy, obedient dogs. They are a great addition to our home and our lives.
The lesson I have learned is that first impressions may be totally wrong. To think I was willing to get rid of Caleigh. Ollie was almost put down. Given that second chance at life, they both have turned out to be fine dogs.
As I face challenges in life, I have to remind myself that I have to stick with them until I am sure of the outcome. If I bail out too quickly, I could be missing a lot of joy and goodness that will result in working through the difficulties.
Friday, April 25, 2008
A Lesson in Giving
When I have gone to other countries, I have been amazed at how generous people have been. I have gotten the impression that they have given to me in a manner that they are not used to living in themselves.
When I have arrived, I am given the place of honour in the household. The finest food and drink are brought out. Often friends are invited in for the occasion. My presence in their household is celebrated.
It reminds me of a question a pastor asked in a sermon on giving.
It occurred when I was a very poor student. I was living from week to week. Often I wrote cheques for my landlord and had to tell him not to cash them until I told him.
In the same crowd was a millionaire accompanied with his wife.
The pastor asked the question, “If a millionaire gives one tenth of his wealth to a charity and a person with ten dollars gives one tenth to the same charity, who gives the most?”
An obvious answer is that millionaire gives the most.
The millionaire’s wife was cleverer. She must have excelled at math. She replied, “Since they both give ten per cent, they are giving equally.” Her answer made a lot of sense.
I slipped up my hand. “Yes, John?” the pastor stated.
Without any intent of embarrassing anyone, I said, “The way I figure it, the person who has ten dollars is giving the most. You see, if I give ten per cent of ten dollars, I only have nine dollars left. I can’t do much with nine dollars. However, if I give ten per cent of a million dollars, I still have nine hundred thousand dollars I can play around with. If you gave me the choice of which person I would like to be, it would be the one with a million dollars.”
I’m sure that you’ve heard of the expression “Give till it hurts.” When you have a lot, it doesn’t hurt very much if you have a lot left over. When the giving is sacrificial, then you understand the true meaning of giving regardless if you are the one doing the receiving or the giving.
When I have arrived, I am given the place of honour in the household. The finest food and drink are brought out. Often friends are invited in for the occasion. My presence in their household is celebrated.
It reminds me of a question a pastor asked in a sermon on giving.
It occurred when I was a very poor student. I was living from week to week. Often I wrote cheques for my landlord and had to tell him not to cash them until I told him.
In the same crowd was a millionaire accompanied with his wife.
The pastor asked the question, “If a millionaire gives one tenth of his wealth to a charity and a person with ten dollars gives one tenth to the same charity, who gives the most?”
An obvious answer is that millionaire gives the most.
The millionaire’s wife was cleverer. She must have excelled at math. She replied, “Since they both give ten per cent, they are giving equally.” Her answer made a lot of sense.
I slipped up my hand. “Yes, John?” the pastor stated.
Without any intent of embarrassing anyone, I said, “The way I figure it, the person who has ten dollars is giving the most. You see, if I give ten per cent of ten dollars, I only have nine dollars left. I can’t do much with nine dollars. However, if I give ten per cent of a million dollars, I still have nine hundred thousand dollars I can play around with. If you gave me the choice of which person I would like to be, it would be the one with a million dollars.”
I’m sure that you’ve heard of the expression “Give till it hurts.” When you have a lot, it doesn’t hurt very much if you have a lot left over. When the giving is sacrificial, then you understand the true meaning of giving regardless if you are the one doing the receiving or the giving.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Are We Doomed?
Over a year ago, a librarian at one of the schools I visited told me that I had to read a book. Its title is A Short History of Progress by Ronald Wright.
I like it when people share information like this. I followed up by buying the book and reading it.
The book is about how the predicament our civilization faces now has been repeated many times in history. Progress is made by a society, which brings on a crisis. Unfortunately, there are too many examples of where the result was utter ruin.
The example that I remember the most is the story of the Easter Island.
When it was discovered by the Dutch hundreds of years ago, the tribe that made the many carvings of heads on the island inhabited it. The island also had many trees. The wood was used to prop up these heads, for building homes and for fire.
Today, Easter Island is a barren, uninhabited, inhospitable place.
As the inhabitants’ society flourished, so did their need for the wood. Tree after tree was felled until there was only one left. The point is then made that somebody had to cut down the last tree knowing that there were no others.
When I look at the dilemma we face in today’s world, I don’t think we are any different. There are people who would kill the last elephant for its ivory, the last leopard for its skin or the last anything to make some money. It’s nice to believe that we are more intelligent now.
The book points out, though, that the stakes are much higher now. The whole planet is at risk. We can’t afford to fail.
Considering how the price of food has shot up dramatically in the past few months, I can’t help but wonder how it can get better. Some countries are experiencing food riots.
Meanwhile, we are using valuable agricultural land to grow corn to make ethanol gasoline for our automobiles. We seem to care about our cars more than people.
Will we learn from our past mistakes? The next few years will be quite interesting.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Skype
I just talked to Gerry Munden on Skype. We met through slow pitch softball in England in the 1980s. He now lives in New Zealand.
Skype is a software that lets you phone anywhere in the world.
Three things amazed me.
First, the quality of the call was excellent. His voice was loud and clear, which was pretty good considering my headset cost less than $20.
Second, we talked for more than 45 minutes and it didn’t cost me a cent. While I was talking computer to computer, they have a plan where you can talk to a regular phone anywhere in the USA or Canada for less than $3/month.
Third, even though we hadn’t talked for years, it seemed like yesterday. We reminisced about the good old days. We also caught up on our lives as they are now.
Those were good old days, too. While teams merely shake hands over here after a game, in England they usually end up going to the pub together.
Another thing that cemented our bond is that we were the pioneers of softball in Britain. It really hadn’t been going that long. Equipment was expensive. Just getting a field to play on was difficult. There were no backstops.
But we had fun and strong friendships were forged. It’s great to know that while they may have been dormant for awhile, they are still as strong as ever.
Monday, April 21, 2008
A Letter to Bono
Dear Bono,
I appreciate your involvement in fighting poverty. You are pretty good at embarrassing governments into giving more to Third World Countries. As you said to our former Prime Minister and your friend Paul Martin, you would be “a pain in the ass” if he didn’t keep his commitment.
In spite of your efforts, I don’t think it is working. As food prices rise, rioting is starting to break out in Haiti and Kenya. Freedom is being threatened in Zimbabwe. The world doesn’t seem to be getting any better.
As we feed more and more people in the Third World, the population seems to be increasing while the population is in decline in many wealthier countries, particularly those with strict immigration policies.
We need your help. No, I am not talking about another concert broadcast around the world by your rock buddies. It’s amazing how they assemble every four years or so, get everybody excited then seem to disappear into their mansions after persuading the masses to dig deeply into their pockets.
What I ask you and your cronies to do is to become more involved in these poverty-stricken countries.
Why don’t a few of you get the artists of the world together with a guy like Richard Branson and figure out a way you can start industries in these places? Provide the people with jobs so they can afford food and proper medical care. Find ways to keep the bright young minds from coming to places like Canada. Sink your collective money into creating industries.
I know it won’t be easy. You will have to deal with dictators, corruption and criminals. Along the way you may appreciate the obstacles non-government and government organizations face. You can do it. Of course, being a “pain in the ass” is easier when somebody is actually a nice guy. It’s much more difficult when you are doing it to thugs.
While you’re at it, why not get a few athletes involved. Plenty of them make lots of money too. For example, talk to Tiger Woods about creating his own line of clothing made in Haiti, one of the poorest nations in the world.
Oh, and one final word. Help get these workers in all Third World countries fair working conditions and wages. That means you will have to be a “pain in the ass” to companies like Walmart. You have some clout, though. You could forbid any of your music to be sold in stores buying goods from exploited people.
So, it’s up to you, Bono. It’s time to get your hands dirty and get to the root of the problem. I hope I am not being “a pain in the ass”, but if I am I think you should be able to forgive me.
Sincerely yours,
Johnny V.
P.S. Sorry if I keep getting you confused with the late Sonny Bono, even though you pronounce your name differently.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Words
The Greeks have four words for love. We have only one. This creates confusion. If people say that they love you, what does it mean? In English, this can mean anything from something very passionate to the love someone would have for a favourite television program. If words define your love, you are probably going to be disappointed anyway. Just saying it really doesn’t amount to a lot unless there are actions to back it up. In fact, the actions, as the saying goes, speak louder than words.
I have been told that the Inuit have seven or so words for snow. In Canada, we have more than one, sleet being one of them.
What I find amusing is that we have many, many words for vomiting. Does this indicate where we have put our priorities in society? I hope not. I would rather we invent a few more words for love.
I have been told that the Inuit have seven or so words for snow. In Canada, we have more than one, sleet being one of them.
What I find amusing is that we have many, many words for vomiting. Does this indicate where we have put our priorities in society? I hope not. I would rather we invent a few more words for love.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Artistic Freedom
The artists are on the march. The Canadian government has decided that it is going to be more selective when it doles out the taxpayer’s money to fund film production.
The government’s take is that it is not preventing people from making certain kinds of films. It just does not want to be in the business of funding them.
The response from many in the film community has been that the government is limiting artistic freedom and participating in censorship.
I am getting tired of people who keep on playing the artistic freedom card without ever talking about artistic responsibility.
As a taxpayer, I don’t want to see my money given to somebody who makes this world a worse place to live. What do I mean?
If you complain about the amount of sex in the media, people will point to the violence and say that it is worse. Ok, then let’s cut down on the violence. Oh, we can’t do that because that is limiting artistic freedom.
Meanwhile, we are pushing boundaries that harm society. More sex and more violence equal more viewers and that means more money. That is what drives this so-called artistic freedom.
Make your films if you wish, but don’t use my money.
The government’s take is that it is not preventing people from making certain kinds of films. It just does not want to be in the business of funding them.
The response from many in the film community has been that the government is limiting artistic freedom and participating in censorship.
I am getting tired of people who keep on playing the artistic freedom card without ever talking about artistic responsibility.
As a taxpayer, I don’t want to see my money given to somebody who makes this world a worse place to live. What do I mean?
If you complain about the amount of sex in the media, people will point to the violence and say that it is worse. Ok, then let’s cut down on the violence. Oh, we can’t do that because that is limiting artistic freedom.
Meanwhile, we are pushing boundaries that harm society. More sex and more violence equal more viewers and that means more money. That is what drives this so-called artistic freedom.
Make your films if you wish, but don’t use my money.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Stepping Outside of Your Comfort Zone
Why am I doing this?
My wife, Marie, belongs to an association of human resources professionals. They are having a conference next Tuesday. I have been invited to MC the closing session.
I have a few housekeeping items to do. I have to conduct a draw for prizes and remind delegates to recycle their badges.
I also have to try to end the conference on a positive note.
Marie has suggested I use some material from this blog. I will take her suggestion, but it is easier to sit alone at the keyboard than stand in front of 125 professionals who have spent a whole day listening to speakers.
Last year they hired a comedienne. Marie said she was really good. Personally, I wish she had not been so good. It’s easier to follow the footsteps of a poor performance. However, I need to adopt the attitude of Al Jolson when he performed after the great Caruso. His words were, “You ain’t seen nothing yet!”
I am stepping outside of my comfort zone. There is no doubt about it.
While I am a bit nervous, years ago I would have been terrified. Not any more! I feel more like an athlete anticipating the start of the game.
Success isn’t guaranteed, but neither is failure unless I talk myself into it. Regardless of what happens, the worst-case scenario is that I will be exactly where I am now. However, the potential of what could happen is very interesting.
In fact, there are no guarantees in life unless you do nothing. When you do nothing, I can guarantee that nothing will happen.
In spite of the tension, I am just going to do my best. I will concentrate on the opportunity that is being presented to me and consider myself fortunate to have it. Then, I will accept whatever happens, knowing that I have done my best.
My wife, Marie, belongs to an association of human resources professionals. They are having a conference next Tuesday. I have been invited to MC the closing session.
I have a few housekeeping items to do. I have to conduct a draw for prizes and remind delegates to recycle their badges.
I also have to try to end the conference on a positive note.
Marie has suggested I use some material from this blog. I will take her suggestion, but it is easier to sit alone at the keyboard than stand in front of 125 professionals who have spent a whole day listening to speakers.
Last year they hired a comedienne. Marie said she was really good. Personally, I wish she had not been so good. It’s easier to follow the footsteps of a poor performance. However, I need to adopt the attitude of Al Jolson when he performed after the great Caruso. His words were, “You ain’t seen nothing yet!”
I am stepping outside of my comfort zone. There is no doubt about it.
While I am a bit nervous, years ago I would have been terrified. Not any more! I feel more like an athlete anticipating the start of the game.
Success isn’t guaranteed, but neither is failure unless I talk myself into it. Regardless of what happens, the worst-case scenario is that I will be exactly where I am now. However, the potential of what could happen is very interesting.
In fact, there are no guarantees in life unless you do nothing. When you do nothing, I can guarantee that nothing will happen.
In spite of the tension, I am just going to do my best. I will concentrate on the opportunity that is being presented to me and consider myself fortunate to have it. Then, I will accept whatever happens, knowing that I have done my best.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
The Truth and the Internet
Many tend to think of the Internet as an area where people have total freedom of speech. While this may be true, people tend to believe what they read on it to be true. Today while searching for a Greek restaurant in London, Ontario, it became very apparent that what I was reading might not be the truth at all.
In London, there are three Greek restaurants I found: Mykonos, Santorini and the Mythic Grill.
Also online was an internet site where anybody can rate the restaurants. Santorini is rather new, so there were only two reviews. Mykonos had 30 and the Mythic Grill had 52. The average score out of 10 for Mykonos is 7.4. The Mythic comes in at 9.1.
I have never eaten at the Mythic Grill, but I intend to one day. Looking at the scores, it appears to be the best Greek restaurant in London. But is it?
When you look at the ratings for both restaurants you find some glowing reviews that sound like Bruno on Dancing With the Stars. The scores are nines and tens. What I find incredible is that there are ratings of one to contrast with these high scores. The ones that have these abysmal numbers have very little comments. It appears as if the friends of each restaurant are taking turns writing reviews that would be the envy of top restaurants in the Michelin Guide, while others are trashing the competition.
Seriously, there would have to be something drastically wrong for me to give a rating of 1 for the food. This score would be for something that was barely edible like cardboard.
The absence of mid-range reviews also makes me suspicious. It seems as if people adore or abhor each restaurant.
Can I trust these reviews? I don’t think so. That is why I hope to try Santorini and the Mythic Grill. Stay tuned and I will eventually give you the truth – at least the truth as I see it.
In London, there are three Greek restaurants I found: Mykonos, Santorini and the Mythic Grill.
Also online was an internet site where anybody can rate the restaurants. Santorini is rather new, so there were only two reviews. Mykonos had 30 and the Mythic Grill had 52. The average score out of 10 for Mykonos is 7.4. The Mythic comes in at 9.1.
I have never eaten at the Mythic Grill, but I intend to one day. Looking at the scores, it appears to be the best Greek restaurant in London. But is it?
When you look at the ratings for both restaurants you find some glowing reviews that sound like Bruno on Dancing With the Stars. The scores are nines and tens. What I find incredible is that there are ratings of one to contrast with these high scores. The ones that have these abysmal numbers have very little comments. It appears as if the friends of each restaurant are taking turns writing reviews that would be the envy of top restaurants in the Michelin Guide, while others are trashing the competition.
Seriously, there would have to be something drastically wrong for me to give a rating of 1 for the food. This score would be for something that was barely edible like cardboard.
The absence of mid-range reviews also makes me suspicious. It seems as if people adore or abhor each restaurant.
Can I trust these reviews? I don’t think so. That is why I hope to try Santorini and the Mythic Grill. Stay tuned and I will eventually give you the truth – at least the truth as I see it.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
A Clean Slate
The last time I had this class it was a disaster. They were unruly and did not treat me with dignity at all. Since the principal and their teacher were in the building, I summoned them to the classroom to hear what I had to say to the students. All in all it was an unpleasant scene.
Today I had them again.
I could have gone into the classroom dragging along every memory of that day a few weeks ago. But I didn’t.
First, I asked myself if I had forgiven them. If I had, then the slate was wiped clean.
Second, I asked myself what good would it do me to drag along this baggage from the past. There was no advantage, so I chose to start fresh with them again this time.
When they entered the classroom, they were met with a teacher who felt positive. I told them that I felt really good today.
The result was a complete turnaround of the class. They were rather shocked that I felt so positive towards them. Rather than be defensive, I was offensive with lots of praise. They responded in a positive way, too.
Most people have somebody in their lives who bugs them. They are thorns in their sides. Often the strategy is to avoid that person. Inevitably they must be faced again.
Rather than dragging along past emotions, why not start fresh? Wipe that slate clean. Holding on to the past really won’t accomplish very much. The only thing you have to assure yourself is that you won’t tolerate the same behaviour that you experienced before. If you are positive about the situation, then that is a good start to accomplish just that.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Being the First
It’s great being the one of first ones to do something. In the 50s, everyone knew the first family to get a television. In the 60s, it was the first family to get a colour television, even though the colour was pretty bad in those days.
Being one of the first to do or get something can be pretty lonely. Consider this.
If you were the first person to get a telephone in your neighbourhood, whom would you call?
Think if you were one of the first people to get the invention called the radio. In the beginning there weren’t many programs or stations to choose from.
Television was the same. If you were one of the first ones to get a colour TV, most of the shows were not in colour. Remember the NBC peacock? It was put at the beginning of a program to indicate that it was in colour.
When I was in London, England, I worked at the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. It was there I saw my first facsimile machine or fax. It reproduced low-resolution images and text. It took many minutes for the page to be completed. At that time, not many people had fax machines, so if you had one, there were few people you could send one to. By the 90s, everybody seemed to have one and couldn’t survive without one. Technology has advanced so they are seldom used any more. When was the last time you sent a fax?
I had an email address before 1990. My office was at Carleton University and I signed up for something called Freenet, which used something called the Internet. I still remember my account number. It was ac474. Since Carleton had one of the first Freenets in Canada, it meant that I was one of the first few thousands of people to have an email account. Do you know what my problem was? I didn’t have anybody to send email to. Nobody I knew had an email address. Just like all other technology, it was only a matter of time before almost everybody was connected.
There was one great advantage of the early days. I didn’t get any junk mail. Spam was non-existent. Considering that 90% of my emails are undesirable, I sometimes long for the good old days.
Even computers have changed. I remember the big old floppy disks. Suddenly we got the smaller diskettes. The problem was if you wanted to transfer data from one machine to another. Now they don’t sell computers with anything that will accept disks. My guess is that in the next few years the CD will bite the dust.
If you come up with some brilliant idea, don’t be alarmed if “nobody else is doing it.” Just like these other great inventions, you might be ahead of your time. Sure you might be alone for a while, but there can only be one leader. So stay with your convictions and wait for everybody else to catch up. Don’t feel embarrassed or worried if you are all by yourself.
Being one of the first to do or get something can be pretty lonely. Consider this.
If you were the first person to get a telephone in your neighbourhood, whom would you call?
Think if you were one of the first people to get the invention called the radio. In the beginning there weren’t many programs or stations to choose from.
Television was the same. If you were one of the first ones to get a colour TV, most of the shows were not in colour. Remember the NBC peacock? It was put at the beginning of a program to indicate that it was in colour.
When I was in London, England, I worked at the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. It was there I saw my first facsimile machine or fax. It reproduced low-resolution images and text. It took many minutes for the page to be completed. At that time, not many people had fax machines, so if you had one, there were few people you could send one to. By the 90s, everybody seemed to have one and couldn’t survive without one. Technology has advanced so they are seldom used any more. When was the last time you sent a fax?
I had an email address before 1990. My office was at Carleton University and I signed up for something called Freenet, which used something called the Internet. I still remember my account number. It was ac474. Since Carleton had one of the first Freenets in Canada, it meant that I was one of the first few thousands of people to have an email account. Do you know what my problem was? I didn’t have anybody to send email to. Nobody I knew had an email address. Just like all other technology, it was only a matter of time before almost everybody was connected.
There was one great advantage of the early days. I didn’t get any junk mail. Spam was non-existent. Considering that 90% of my emails are undesirable, I sometimes long for the good old days.
Even computers have changed. I remember the big old floppy disks. Suddenly we got the smaller diskettes. The problem was if you wanted to transfer data from one machine to another. Now they don’t sell computers with anything that will accept disks. My guess is that in the next few years the CD will bite the dust.
If you come up with some brilliant idea, don’t be alarmed if “nobody else is doing it.” Just like these other great inventions, you might be ahead of your time. Sure you might be alone for a while, but there can only be one leader. So stay with your convictions and wait for everybody else to catch up. Don’t feel embarrassed or worried if you are all by yourself.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Riverside
We run a bed and breakfast. Some ask us how we can do such a thing. Don’t we value our privacy? The truth is that there are some days when we would prefer to be alone, but there are very few of these. Most of the time the people who seem to wander in our lives fascinate us. Every one of them has a story and I do my best to draw it out of everyone.
Before we decided to get into the business, we visited many establishments in the United Kingdom and a few in Canada. We noted what we liked in each and what we didn’t. The result is what we provide our guests with today.
We wanted to grow slowly, so in spite of everyone telling us to advertise here or there, we are only on the Internet and in our town’s tourism brochure, mainly to show support for St. Marys.
From the very start we have said that if we couldn’t grow by word of mouth, we didn’t deserve to grow.
From the moment our guests’ foot hits our beautiful, Victorian front porch we are doing our best to look after them. We show them to their rooms and ask if we can get them something to drink. One particular gentleman had had a difficult time at customs and on the drive and he asked, “Do you have a beer?” A few minutes later he was relaxing on the front porch, brew in hand, watching the river float by.
We have a menu from which they can choose their breakfast. Guests often ask us what time breakfast is. We in turn ask them when they want it. We make it very clear that we are in no rush to get rid of them.
We constantly ask if there is anything we can do for them.
Our breakfasts are rather hearty. We have fruit salad, baked goods, yoghurt, three kinds of juices, the best coffee in the world and an entrée. Many guests can’t finish everything. No problem. We will pack them a doggie bag.
Do you like sausages? We get the best we can, but we go one better. We barbecue them. It doesn’t matter if there is a raging snowstorm outside or if it is minus 20 Celsius, I am out there in the morning cooking them. Why? They taste better and are less greasy this way.
The result has been that many of our clients come back time and time again. We go that extra mile. The reward is the smiles and compliments we receive. That’s not to say that things go perfectly every time, but we do our best to do our best. We have fun doing it.
Our philosophy sums up how we feel: Come as guests; leave as friends. Perhaps one day we will have the pleasure of pampering you.
You can see our website at www.riversidestmarys.biz.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Judge Not …
Matthew 7: 1 - Judge not, that ye be not judged.
It seems whenever you judge something that people don’t like, they quote this verse of scripture. If I don’t sometimes judge, then everything is potentially fine. Somebody can rob me and I can’t judge what they do as bad? I don’t quite understand why I shouldn’t judge some things.
First, we judge a lot in life. We judge the food we eat. Is it nutritional? Is it good for our bodies? We judge who is the best skater or contestant in a beauty pageant. We judge many, many things?
But is it right to judge people?
If it isn’t, then we have to agree to see only the good in a great many villains in history. There will be some who will argue, for example, that we don’t understand the circumstances that terrorists face. If we did, we would be more sympathetic to their situation.
I remember reading a story of how the Irish Republican Army went into a man’s home and gave him a choice. He would either ram a car full of explosives he was to drive into a British outpost or they would kill his wife and children. I don’t think I want to even try to understand the type of mind that would do such a thing. I don’t care if you think if I am wrong in judging these people to be bad. Tough! Doing what they did was wrong.
Of course we have to judge people. We do it all the time. Somebody enters a room. As soon as they do, you make a decision or two. You think he looks handsome, well dressed, smart, etc. Now, I don’t think this type of judging is fair, but people still do it.
And the fact you judge people is often good. If you didn’t judge people, you would fall for every scam that’s out there. You would never choose somebody to buy a car from, represent you in a court of law or go out on a date with. You would simply let life flow over you without any care of what was best for your development as a human being. You would believe everything you are told.
However, when I am in doubt, I often ask others. One person I go to is Ron, a friend of mine. He is able to read the Bible in Greek and Hebrew. I trust his opinion a lot. I asked him about this particular passage of scripture. Here is his reply.
What is funny about this quote is not the quote itself, but the fact that those who cite it usually demonstrate by the way they do so that they do not understand it. They use this 'killer blow' in order to rebuke anyone who expresses a negative judgment about someone else. Of course, their rebuke rebounds against them. Their point is, "You are wrong to criticize others." But this statement is in itself a criticism of the individual to whom it is addressed, so it applies equally to the rebuker.
Those who cite these words usually divorce them from the illumination provided by their literary context. Many Biblical words have a wide range of meanings that is controlled by their individual contexts. In this passage, as in many others, Jesus uses hyperbole to make a point dramatically. In the context of this quote in Mt 7:1-6, it is clear that what Jesus is speaking about is not, strictly speaking, judgment per se, but harsh or unfair judgment. One contextual indicator invites this understanding of His meaning, and another absolutely requires it.
The first of these is His remark (in verses 2f) that the standard of judgment that we use will be applied to us. Clearly we will be judged, but none of us wants to be judged harshly or unfairly.
The second contextual indicator that absolutely requires this interpretation is his parallel command in verse 6 to not cast our pearls before swine. We must obey this instruction, but in order to be able to obey it one must first judge certain individuals to be swine, spiritually speaking. You cannot do this if you entirely rule out the propriety of judging or negatively assessing others.
Thus, the meaning of verses one and six is clarified by their being placed alongside one another. A similar crucial pair of verses is found in Proverbs 26:4 & 5. Taken literally, these two verses seem to contradict each other, until you realize that each of them expresses a worthwhile principle. The insightful reader appreciates that the key is in knowing which of them to apply in a given situation. The same is true of this pair of commands from our Lord.
Ron, you said it well. Thank you.
It seems whenever you judge something that people don’t like, they quote this verse of scripture. If I don’t sometimes judge, then everything is potentially fine. Somebody can rob me and I can’t judge what they do as bad? I don’t quite understand why I shouldn’t judge some things.
First, we judge a lot in life. We judge the food we eat. Is it nutritional? Is it good for our bodies? We judge who is the best skater or contestant in a beauty pageant. We judge many, many things?
But is it right to judge people?
If it isn’t, then we have to agree to see only the good in a great many villains in history. There will be some who will argue, for example, that we don’t understand the circumstances that terrorists face. If we did, we would be more sympathetic to their situation.
I remember reading a story of how the Irish Republican Army went into a man’s home and gave him a choice. He would either ram a car full of explosives he was to drive into a British outpost or they would kill his wife and children. I don’t think I want to even try to understand the type of mind that would do such a thing. I don’t care if you think if I am wrong in judging these people to be bad. Tough! Doing what they did was wrong.
Of course we have to judge people. We do it all the time. Somebody enters a room. As soon as they do, you make a decision or two. You think he looks handsome, well dressed, smart, etc. Now, I don’t think this type of judging is fair, but people still do it.
And the fact you judge people is often good. If you didn’t judge people, you would fall for every scam that’s out there. You would never choose somebody to buy a car from, represent you in a court of law or go out on a date with. You would simply let life flow over you without any care of what was best for your development as a human being. You would believe everything you are told.
However, when I am in doubt, I often ask others. One person I go to is Ron, a friend of mine. He is able to read the Bible in Greek and Hebrew. I trust his opinion a lot. I asked him about this particular passage of scripture. Here is his reply.
What is funny about this quote is not the quote itself, but the fact that those who cite it usually demonstrate by the way they do so that they do not understand it. They use this 'killer blow' in order to rebuke anyone who expresses a negative judgment about someone else. Of course, their rebuke rebounds against them. Their point is, "You are wrong to criticize others." But this statement is in itself a criticism of the individual to whom it is addressed, so it applies equally to the rebuker.
Those who cite these words usually divorce them from the illumination provided by their literary context. Many Biblical words have a wide range of meanings that is controlled by their individual contexts. In this passage, as in many others, Jesus uses hyperbole to make a point dramatically. In the context of this quote in Mt 7:1-6, it is clear that what Jesus is speaking about is not, strictly speaking, judgment per se, but harsh or unfair judgment. One contextual indicator invites this understanding of His meaning, and another absolutely requires it.
The first of these is His remark (in verses 2f) that the standard of judgment that we use will be applied to us. Clearly we will be judged, but none of us wants to be judged harshly or unfairly.
The second contextual indicator that absolutely requires this interpretation is his parallel command in verse 6 to not cast our pearls before swine. We must obey this instruction, but in order to be able to obey it one must first judge certain individuals to be swine, spiritually speaking. You cannot do this if you entirely rule out the propriety of judging or negatively assessing others.
Thus, the meaning of verses one and six is clarified by their being placed alongside one another. A similar crucial pair of verses is found in Proverbs 26:4 & 5. Taken literally, these two verses seem to contradict each other, until you realize that each of them expresses a worthwhile principle. The insightful reader appreciates that the key is in knowing which of them to apply in a given situation. The same is true of this pair of commands from our Lord.
Ron, you said it well. Thank you.
Friday, April 11, 2008
My Big Interviews
When I worked for CBC television in England, I was called upon to do interviews with some sports figures from time to time. I hated it.
The thought of asking questions that would be heard by over a million people terrified me. What if I asked something dumb? Whoever said there is no such thing as a dumb question never heard me in those days.
What made things worse is that the people I had to interview participated in sports I didn’t like or knew nothing about.
My first venture into sports journalism was a Canadian lad who participated in a sport where he went around this obstacle course on a bicycle. I still don’t know the name of the event. I had no clue what to ask him.
Next was Formula 2 racing. I hate auto racing. The way I figure it, they could take the same race and just edit it a different way each year for television. I really have no idea of where the cars are.
I went to a place called Silverstone in the United Kingdom thinking I might be caught by the bug. After hearing the loud buzzing of the cars all day, which continued into my sleep, I have no desire to go back. I realize that when I say that I got to meet the mechanical crew and the driver and got the whole experience there will be people thinking that I was in heaven. My fondest memory is the lunch that was served.
To top it off, the Canadian driver didn’t finish the race. When it came time to do the interview, he really didn’t want to talk to me. Ouch!
I learned the most of how to conduct an interview quite by accident. It was at the World Rowing Championships in Nottingham. I have rowed a rowboat, but that really doesn’t compare to the sleek sculls these athletes use.
My job was to provide close-ups of the Canadians to supplement the BBC coverage and to interview those who did well. The close-ups were done at the start of the race; the interviews at the other end of the course over 1000 metres away.
Everything was going as planned until a Canadian pair unexpectedly won a silver medal. My camera operator and I saw it suddenly on the scoreboard and we raced down the course in our car. I was quickly trying to think what I should ask the two men.
I gathered the two elated rowers, the camera started and I blurted, “That was some race. Tell me about it.” Like two thoroughbred horses coming out of the gate, they described everything – their thoughts, their actions – everything from start to finish. It turned out to be a great interview.
It was then I discovered that my job was to put the subject on the stage and let him shine. I didn’t have to get up there with him. My questions were meant to illuminate the person that’s all. I didn’t have to be part of the show. If people liked my role in the process that was fine, but it all hinged on the person I was interviewing.
There are times when I would like the opportunity I had then again. I certainly wouldn’t have the fear of looking dumb. I would just focus on the person and shine my lights on him.
And doesn’t it work with people the same in life? If we illuminate them and allow them to shine, don’t they appreciate us more than if we try to jump on the stage with them and steal the show?
The thought of asking questions that would be heard by over a million people terrified me. What if I asked something dumb? Whoever said there is no such thing as a dumb question never heard me in those days.
What made things worse is that the people I had to interview participated in sports I didn’t like or knew nothing about.
My first venture into sports journalism was a Canadian lad who participated in a sport where he went around this obstacle course on a bicycle. I still don’t know the name of the event. I had no clue what to ask him.
Next was Formula 2 racing. I hate auto racing. The way I figure it, they could take the same race and just edit it a different way each year for television. I really have no idea of where the cars are.
I went to a place called Silverstone in the United Kingdom thinking I might be caught by the bug. After hearing the loud buzzing of the cars all day, which continued into my sleep, I have no desire to go back. I realize that when I say that I got to meet the mechanical crew and the driver and got the whole experience there will be people thinking that I was in heaven. My fondest memory is the lunch that was served.
To top it off, the Canadian driver didn’t finish the race. When it came time to do the interview, he really didn’t want to talk to me. Ouch!
I learned the most of how to conduct an interview quite by accident. It was at the World Rowing Championships in Nottingham. I have rowed a rowboat, but that really doesn’t compare to the sleek sculls these athletes use.
My job was to provide close-ups of the Canadians to supplement the BBC coverage and to interview those who did well. The close-ups were done at the start of the race; the interviews at the other end of the course over 1000 metres away.
Everything was going as planned until a Canadian pair unexpectedly won a silver medal. My camera operator and I saw it suddenly on the scoreboard and we raced down the course in our car. I was quickly trying to think what I should ask the two men.
I gathered the two elated rowers, the camera started and I blurted, “That was some race. Tell me about it.” Like two thoroughbred horses coming out of the gate, they described everything – their thoughts, their actions – everything from start to finish. It turned out to be a great interview.
It was then I discovered that my job was to put the subject on the stage and let him shine. I didn’t have to get up there with him. My questions were meant to illuminate the person that’s all. I didn’t have to be part of the show. If people liked my role in the process that was fine, but it all hinged on the person I was interviewing.
There are times when I would like the opportunity I had then again. I certainly wouldn’t have the fear of looking dumb. I would just focus on the person and shine my lights on him.
And doesn’t it work with people the same in life? If we illuminate them and allow them to shine, don’t they appreciate us more than if we try to jump on the stage with them and steal the show?
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Sawatsky
When I was the Executive Director for the Canadian Association of Journalists, I had the pleasure of meeting John Sawatsky.
He was a struggling journalist living in an apartment at the back of a house. We often went out for Chinese food and shared our dreams.
I had heard that he had given a seminar or two about a methodology for asking questions in an interview. For our convention, we decided to have workshops for the first time. I asked John if he would do his. He said yes.
Of the eight workshops we had, more than half of them received positive comments. I remember journalists exiting John’s like newborn Christians at a revival meeting. They were excited about what they had heard. Many commented that their interviewing process had changed that day and they would be able to apply what they had learned immediately.
Being exposed to journalists from all over Canada didn’t hurt. Soon John was conducting his seminars around the country and eventually around the world.
Although his workshops are much more than this, here is a list of the seven deadly sins journalists make when conducting interviews.
Deadly Sin #1: No query
You make a statement, but fail to ask a question
Deadly Sin #2: Double-barrelled questions
You ask two questions. The person responds by answering the easiest one.
Deadly Sin: #3 Overloading
Your question is too complicated. The person is confused at what the real question is.
Deadly Sin: #4 Remarks
You add your own remarks, which can taint the response.
Deadly Sin: #5 Trigger words
You use words which will inflame or upset the person, rather than provoking an insightful answer.
Deadly Sin: #6 Hyperbole
You use an exaggeration in your question, which can affect the answer.
Deadly Sin #7: Closed Queries
Your question can be answered with a simple yes or no when you would like more detail.
In his presentation, he shows video clips from very famous journalists like Mike Wallace and Larry King. Word has gotten back to these people and they have defended themselves against John’s exposition of their perceived flaws. I laugh that these media giants are commenting on what a humble guy from Winkler, Manitoba said – somebody they wouldn’t have even heard of a few years ago.
Eventually John Sawatsky got a job working exclusively with ESPN in the United States and the last I heard, he is now one of the vice presidents.
I am happy for John and the success he has achieved. He reminds me that if you keep working hard and following what you believe, good things will happen to you.
I look forward to the next time we have Chinese food together. I’m sure he has some good stories to tell. Using his methodology, I’ll have a few good questions.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
One Unhappy Person
When Canada put together its first truly women’s national softball team, it assembled the best players from all over the country.
Actually, this isn’t true. The coach of the national champions persuaded many of his players not to attend the training camp. He told them that Softball Canada would come begging for them before the Pan American Games in Caracas. He was wrong.
The camp was in Newark, New Jersey and one of his players did attend. At that time she was probably considered the best all-round player in Canada. She could do everything – hit, field and pitch.
Partway through our training camp, we played a team that was among the top ten in the USA. Canada won the game, but what was impressive was that this player pitched a one hitter. The other team couldn’t hit her.
When we got back to the residences, she asked to see the coaches. She said she wanted to go home. She was lonely. The conversation lasted about an hour. She phoned home and was encouraged to stay. She still wanted to go home.
It was a tough decision for the coaches, but they made the right one. They told me to get on the phone and get the first flight, which was at 7 am, for her to go home. They wanted her out of the camp before anybody could see her in the morning.
While their decisiveness might sound cruel, they made the right decision. All it takes is one unhappy person to spread problems through a team. It takes the focus off why you are there.
The result is that the team went to the Pan American Games and won the gold medal without the best softball player in Canada. Why? One big factor was that the team was happy.
As a coach, I have experienced the same thing. I had a promising women’s team that performed well in its first year in a women’s league. The next year we added one player. She was poison. We didn’t play up to our potential. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get rid of her. We only had 11 players on the team.
Another year, I had that luxury. When a player was chatting to friends instead of concentrating on the game, I invited her to sit in the stands if she wanted to be a spectator. She left the team. We won the league championship.
Whether you have a team or a business, if you have unhappy people, they will poison you. That doesn’t mean that you start hacking people left and right. You should try to improve and correct situations, but if you are getting nowhere and the person is unhappy, then he can be the problem and you should get rid of the problem. A winning attitude usually means being a good team player. Think of it this way. If people are unhappy, you are only contributing to their happiness by taking them out of a situation they don’t like.
A winning team means directing your mental and physical efforts towards the goal and not letting anything take your eye off the prize. If you can prevent it, don’t allow anybody to rob you of the success you deserve.
Actually, this isn’t true. The coach of the national champions persuaded many of his players not to attend the training camp. He told them that Softball Canada would come begging for them before the Pan American Games in Caracas. He was wrong.
The camp was in Newark, New Jersey and one of his players did attend. At that time she was probably considered the best all-round player in Canada. She could do everything – hit, field and pitch.
Partway through our training camp, we played a team that was among the top ten in the USA. Canada won the game, but what was impressive was that this player pitched a one hitter. The other team couldn’t hit her.
When we got back to the residences, she asked to see the coaches. She said she wanted to go home. She was lonely. The conversation lasted about an hour. She phoned home and was encouraged to stay. She still wanted to go home.
It was a tough decision for the coaches, but they made the right one. They told me to get on the phone and get the first flight, which was at 7 am, for her to go home. They wanted her out of the camp before anybody could see her in the morning.
While their decisiveness might sound cruel, they made the right decision. All it takes is one unhappy person to spread problems through a team. It takes the focus off why you are there.
The result is that the team went to the Pan American Games and won the gold medal without the best softball player in Canada. Why? One big factor was that the team was happy.
As a coach, I have experienced the same thing. I had a promising women’s team that performed well in its first year in a women’s league. The next year we added one player. She was poison. We didn’t play up to our potential. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get rid of her. We only had 11 players on the team.
Another year, I had that luxury. When a player was chatting to friends instead of concentrating on the game, I invited her to sit in the stands if she wanted to be a spectator. She left the team. We won the league championship.
Whether you have a team or a business, if you have unhappy people, they will poison you. That doesn’t mean that you start hacking people left and right. You should try to improve and correct situations, but if you are getting nowhere and the person is unhappy, then he can be the problem and you should get rid of the problem. A winning attitude usually means being a good team player. Think of it this way. If people are unhappy, you are only contributing to their happiness by taking them out of a situation they don’t like.
A winning team means directing your mental and physical efforts towards the goal and not letting anything take your eye off the prize. If you can prevent it, don’t allow anybody to rob you of the success you deserve.
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
Turning a Corner
Are you in a position in life where you are turning a corner? If you are, it won’t do you any good if you are going in circles. You just can’t turn a corner if you are going around and around.
Put another way, if you are cleaning the toilet, you often have to flush it first; otherwise you may be just swishing around the mess that existed before you decided to clean it.
There are times when we decide we have to make some changes in our lives. We want to make our life better. These often involve taking some risks.
My feeling, though, is that as much as we can change the circumstances, if we are unwilling to recognize our need to change ourselves and adapt to the new surroundings, we will make same mistakes that got us in the situation in the first place.
For example, let’s say I buy a puppy and try to train it. After six months of working with the dog, he just won’t obey. I finally decide to get rid of him. He is just too much to handle.
I really want a dog, so I buy a new puppy. In most cases, unless you correct the mistakes you made with the first dog, you will be faced with the same situation again. While the temperament of the pooch may have a lot to do with his ability to be trained, more likely than not, it is your training methods that are to fault. If you don’t recognize this and change, you will be in for trouble.
On a more personal note, as an occasional teacher, I had great difficulty with many classes when I first started. Some days I got a cushy assignment, but most days left me shaking my head. I could have decided to reject classes that gave me a hard time, but I want to be the best teacher I can be. To me, that means being able to handle any situation. The only way I can learn to do this is to be faced with all challenges.
Every day is not perfect, but almost all of them are very enjoyable. Yes, I turned a corner. That corner involved asking a principal to come into my classroom and tell me what I was doing wrong. I also did a lot of asking questions and trial and error every time a day didn’t go so well. If I hadn’t done this, I would have been just going around in circles.
So, do you really want to turn a corner in your life? Then realize that the change that has to be made will not only be external, but internal, as well. It is not only about your environment and others. It is about you, too.
Put another way, if you are cleaning the toilet, you often have to flush it first; otherwise you may be just swishing around the mess that existed before you decided to clean it.
There are times when we decide we have to make some changes in our lives. We want to make our life better. These often involve taking some risks.
My feeling, though, is that as much as we can change the circumstances, if we are unwilling to recognize our need to change ourselves and adapt to the new surroundings, we will make same mistakes that got us in the situation in the first place.
For example, let’s say I buy a puppy and try to train it. After six months of working with the dog, he just won’t obey. I finally decide to get rid of him. He is just too much to handle.
I really want a dog, so I buy a new puppy. In most cases, unless you correct the mistakes you made with the first dog, you will be faced with the same situation again. While the temperament of the pooch may have a lot to do with his ability to be trained, more likely than not, it is your training methods that are to fault. If you don’t recognize this and change, you will be in for trouble.
On a more personal note, as an occasional teacher, I had great difficulty with many classes when I first started. Some days I got a cushy assignment, but most days left me shaking my head. I could have decided to reject classes that gave me a hard time, but I want to be the best teacher I can be. To me, that means being able to handle any situation. The only way I can learn to do this is to be faced with all challenges.
Every day is not perfect, but almost all of them are very enjoyable. Yes, I turned a corner. That corner involved asking a principal to come into my classroom and tell me what I was doing wrong. I also did a lot of asking questions and trial and error every time a day didn’t go so well. If I hadn’t done this, I would have been just going around in circles.
So, do you really want to turn a corner in your life? Then realize that the change that has to be made will not only be external, but internal, as well. It is not only about your environment and others. It is about you, too.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Hard on Myself
I hope that the world forgives me more than I forgive myself.
I don’t know why, but I am extremely hard on myself. I said something that I regret on Friday and I spent all weekend stewing about it. Forget the fact that getting upset does nothing to change the situation. I’m not even sure if I offended the other person. All I know is that I wish I had chosen my words more wisely.
Sometimes my mouth is like a cannon. Once the fuse is lit, out come the words, sometimes with great force. Once the shot is fired, it can be difficult to repair the damage.
Another habit I have when I am hard on myself is replaying the video of all the other times in my life that I have made mistakes. Can you imagine punishing yourself like this? Well, that’s just what I did.
Just like a rocket, my imagination takes over and I am visualizing various scenarios that probably won’t happen, but I still flagellate myself with these thoughts. I waste my time thinking of every “what if” scenario instead of enjoying life in the moment and dealing with the problems if they arise.
So, what am I doing? I am trying to replace these thoughts with good ones.
The first one is a question. Am I perfect? Can I accept the fact that I will make mistakes now and again? Sounds reasonable.
The second is whether my motive was malicious or not. It wasn’t. I just got a brief case of verbal diarrhoea, that’s all.
Then I try to remind myself of all the good things I have done in life. Do I want these negative thoughts to prevent me from doing more for people? Of course not!
Then snap out of it, John! And if you are going through the same process, you do it, too. Wasting energy on negative thoughts, especially ones that may not happen, is draining the potential of a full, positive life.
I don’t know why, but I am extremely hard on myself. I said something that I regret on Friday and I spent all weekend stewing about it. Forget the fact that getting upset does nothing to change the situation. I’m not even sure if I offended the other person. All I know is that I wish I had chosen my words more wisely.
Sometimes my mouth is like a cannon. Once the fuse is lit, out come the words, sometimes with great force. Once the shot is fired, it can be difficult to repair the damage.
Another habit I have when I am hard on myself is replaying the video of all the other times in my life that I have made mistakes. Can you imagine punishing yourself like this? Well, that’s just what I did.
Just like a rocket, my imagination takes over and I am visualizing various scenarios that probably won’t happen, but I still flagellate myself with these thoughts. I waste my time thinking of every “what if” scenario instead of enjoying life in the moment and dealing with the problems if they arise.
So, what am I doing? I am trying to replace these thoughts with good ones.
The first one is a question. Am I perfect? Can I accept the fact that I will make mistakes now and again? Sounds reasonable.
The second is whether my motive was malicious or not. It wasn’t. I just got a brief case of verbal diarrhoea, that’s all.
Then I try to remind myself of all the good things I have done in life. Do I want these negative thoughts to prevent me from doing more for people? Of course not!
Then snap out of it, John! And if you are going through the same process, you do it, too. Wasting energy on negative thoughts, especially ones that may not happen, is draining the potential of a full, positive life.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
A Day of Rest
I’m taking a day off. Trying to write something every day is difficult, especially when there are so many other things on your mind.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Dan Fogelberg
Dan Fogelberg died on December 16, 2007 of prostate cancer. I felt a sense of loss. I can’t say I followed his career closely, although I did enjoy many of his songs.
If you are like me, there as songs that define different periods or moments of your life.
I can remember the first time I heard She Loves You by The Beatles. You Needed Me by Anne Murray came to me at a moment when I needed it most.
It was Dan Fogelberg’s Longer that I remember fondly.
During my year of teaching in Drayton Valley, Alberta, I had hopes of becoming an integral part of a small town. After a month, I realized that this wasn’t going to happen. Each weekend, I couldn’t wait to take the hour and a half drive into Edmonton to visit friends.
As I drove back to Drayton Valley each Sunday night, I would listen to the radio. Every time I would hear the song Longer and remember the love and care friends had given me on the weekend. When I heard that song, it reminded me that people loved me and I loved them. This is what helped get me through one of the most difficult years in my life.
When Fogelberg died, it’s like an era ended. One of my dreams in life is that I will write a song that will touch as many hearts as Longer.
If you haven’t heard it, click on the hyperlink. The lyrics are below.
Longer
Longer than there've been fishes in the ocean
Higher than any bird ever flew
Longer than there've been stars up in the heavens
I've been in love with you
Stronger than any mountain cathedral
Truer than any tree ever grew
Deeper than any forest primeval
I am in love with you
I'll bring fires in the winters
You'll send showers in the springs
We'll fly through the falls and summers
With love on our wings
Through the years as the fire starts to mellow
Burning lines in the book of our lives
Though the binding cracks
And the pages start to yellow
I'll be in love with you
I'll be in love with you
[Instrumental Interlude]
Longer than there've been fishes in the ocean
Higher than any bird ever flew
Longer than there've been stars up in the heavens
I've been in love with you
I am in love with you
As an added treat, click on the hyperlink and listen to one of the most beautiful pieces of music I have ever heard. This was done with Fogelberg teaming up with Tim Weisberg playing the flute. It is called County Clare.
Friday, April 04, 2008
A Stone in My Shoe
I am amazed in life that it is not the big tragedies that bother me the most. It is usually the little things that irritate me. Like a stone in my shoe, they constantly remind me that something is wrong.
Words are like that, too. One slip of the tongue or keyboard can ruin all that has been said or written. One of the main problems with communication is that what you intend to say is quite not often what comes out. Even if it comes out right, that doesn’t mean that the other person will hear it the right way.
How often have any of us said something and as soon as it comes out wish that we could suck the words back?
Unfortunately, in our politically correct world there are those who are quite ready to jump on your faux pas.
If you are on the receiving end of a slip of the tongue, try to remember the last time you committed this error and try to forgive the other person.
If you are the one who has done the transgression, just like a stone in a shoe, try to remove it through an apology. As for forgiveness, but learn to forgive yourself. Realize that you are human, too. You are capable of really screwing things up. I know I am. When I do, I am usually harder on myself than the other person.
The negative thoughts tend to creep in. Every failure in life is replayed with the audio cranked up to full volume.
I have to remind myself of all the positive things I have done in life. Staying negative is not going to improve the situation. Beating yourself up is not going to encourage you to continue to go out in the world and do good deeds. There is no use remembering the stone in your shoe once it is removed.
Words are like that, too. One slip of the tongue or keyboard can ruin all that has been said or written. One of the main problems with communication is that what you intend to say is quite not often what comes out. Even if it comes out right, that doesn’t mean that the other person will hear it the right way.
How often have any of us said something and as soon as it comes out wish that we could suck the words back?
Unfortunately, in our politically correct world there are those who are quite ready to jump on your faux pas.
If you are on the receiving end of a slip of the tongue, try to remember the last time you committed this error and try to forgive the other person.
If you are the one who has done the transgression, just like a stone in a shoe, try to remove it through an apology. As for forgiveness, but learn to forgive yourself. Realize that you are human, too. You are capable of really screwing things up. I know I am. When I do, I am usually harder on myself than the other person.
The negative thoughts tend to creep in. Every failure in life is replayed with the audio cranked up to full volume.
I have to remind myself of all the positive things I have done in life. Staying negative is not going to improve the situation. Beating yourself up is not going to encourage you to continue to go out in the world and do good deeds. There is no use remembering the stone in your shoe once it is removed.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Three Women
A few months ago, one of the articles from my blog called “The Corsage” was published by another party and sent around the world. This was the third of four that have been used. I always put my email address because I like getting the feedback. Each person has a story and today’s blog is about two women who read that article. The third happened to stumble on my blog and read the poem called “The Subway Musician”.
I have never met any of these women. My guess is that I probably never will, but each responded because she was touched by what I had to write. They, in turn, have touched me with their artistry.
http://www.marcome.com/home.htm
Whatever Marcomé does seems to be first-class. The quality of her website shines through. The second quality you feel is her gentleness. Her following is growing. Once you listen to her music, you can understand why. Like Brazilian soccer players, she goes by only one name. I chuckle and wonder if such an exotic first name is followed by something simple like Smith. Somehow I doubt it.
http://www.jenniferstackpole.com/index.html
Jennifer Stackpole, like Marcomé, is an independent musician and actress. Her songs have more of an edge to them, but they are enjoyable.
http://sawlady.com/blog/
Finally, there’s Natalia Paruz. As I said, she read “The Subway Musician” and asked if she could put it on her blog. Why? Among other things, she is a subway musician in New York City. She plays the saw. Listen to her. It is really quite amazing.
All three of these women have amazing talent. They are pursuing their dreams and I wish them well. I am writing very little about them for two reasons. I want you to discover them on your own. The real reason is that I really don’t know them that well at all.
What fascinates me it the way the Internet has changed the world. I have been able to touch personally three individuals with my words and, hopefully, make their lives better and they have been able to influence mine in a personal way, too, even though we may never meet. It’s not like hearing a song from somebody. We have sent emails back and forth. This would not have happened thirty years ago and I don’t mean because the women were probably not born. It’s just that today’s world is redefining the spectrum of relationships that can exist. You can share your thoughts with complete strangers.
I have appreciated my contact with these three and I will monitor their progress expecting to see reach their dreams one day.
I have never met any of these women. My guess is that I probably never will, but each responded because she was touched by what I had to write. They, in turn, have touched me with their artistry.
http://www.marcome.com/home.htm
Whatever Marcomé does seems to be first-class. The quality of her website shines through. The second quality you feel is her gentleness. Her following is growing. Once you listen to her music, you can understand why. Like Brazilian soccer players, she goes by only one name. I chuckle and wonder if such an exotic first name is followed by something simple like Smith. Somehow I doubt it.
http://www.jenniferstackpole.com/index.html
Jennifer Stackpole, like Marcomé, is an independent musician and actress. Her songs have more of an edge to them, but they are enjoyable.
http://sawlady.com/blog/
Finally, there’s Natalia Paruz. As I said, she read “The Subway Musician” and asked if she could put it on her blog. Why? Among other things, she is a subway musician in New York City. She plays the saw. Listen to her. It is really quite amazing.
All three of these women have amazing talent. They are pursuing their dreams and I wish them well. I am writing very little about them for two reasons. I want you to discover them on your own. The real reason is that I really don’t know them that well at all.
What fascinates me it the way the Internet has changed the world. I have been able to touch personally three individuals with my words and, hopefully, make their lives better and they have been able to influence mine in a personal way, too, even though we may never meet. It’s not like hearing a song from somebody. We have sent emails back and forth. This would not have happened thirty years ago and I don’t mean because the women were probably not born. It’s just that today’s world is redefining the spectrum of relationships that can exist. You can share your thoughts with complete strangers.
I have appreciated my contact with these three and I will monitor their progress expecting to see reach their dreams one day.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
A Cloudy Day
It rained yesterday. It was a dull, dreary spring day. It was the kind of day that would make me feel down, but it didn’t. I couldn’t help think that in a few days it will be sunny. I was right. Today the sun was shining brilliantly.
As I said, today was sunny, but I noticed something else. When it was sunny today, I didn’t think about the clouds at all. I basked in the warm rays enjoying the spring.
Maybe there’s a lesson to be learned in life from this. When things are not going so well, rather than dwell on the negative, perhaps we can look forward to when our lives will be better, knowing that it will eventually happen.
When things are going well, we should just enjoy the occasion for what it is and smile.
Sometimes I find myself doing the exact opposite. It’s like when you are in a slump in baseball. You go to bat expecting to get out. When you are on a hitting streak, sometimes you say to yourself that you are going to get out sometime. It’s these negative thoughts that invade our minds that hurt us.
I’m going to start expecting the sun to shine in my life when things are not the way I want them. Just like the real sun brightens the sky, the same is going to happen to me. And you know what? The same will happen to you.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
My Sore Shoulder
I have always had a great throwing arm in softball. It was quite by accident that it suddenly became better.
A team at a lower age bracket in Willowdale was going to be facing a pitcher from the Niagara area with an unorthodox delivery. I was the only one they knew who could throw this way. However, it must be remembered that I was not a pitcher.
This team asked if I could throw batting practice to them. I agreed, pitching to all twelve of their players.
The morning after the practice I couldn’t lift my arm above my shoulder. My muscles seemed as if they were totally stripped. There was no way I could even attempt to throw a ball. My doctor said that I had to give my shoulder complete rest for ten days to two weeks.
For two weeks, I had to watch our team play while sitting on the bench. Gradually my shoulder became stronger and I started throwing the ball. In order to toss it, I had to use other muscles than my shoulder. To maximize my efforts, I had to use them in sequence, starting with the legs, to the hips, then the back and so on. When I got to the shoulder muscles, they were gently utilized, and then I flexed the elbow, wrist, and finally the fingers in order.
Through the weeks, the shoulder became stronger, but I found out something. Before my injury, I had been relying on my pectoral muscles for a lot of the force for my throws. While rehabilitating these muscles, I was forced to compensate by using other muscles I had not used so much. The result was that they became stronger. As the shoulder healed, it synchronized with the other muscles and the force of my throws became much, much greater. What were strong tosses became rockets. I was honestly afraid to throw to somebody with my full force if I stood too close. I could throw a softball over 60 yards without a bounce in a straight line.
The same thing often happens to sports teams. The star goes down with an injury and the rest of the team has to pick up the slack until he returns. When he comes back, the whole team is much stronger, because they were relying on him too much before.
If a part of your life is experiencing an “injury”, the purpose may be so that other areas may be strengthened. When the sore heals, your whole life will be that much better if you concentrate on where you can strengthen yourself until you recuperate.
So don’t moan that things might not be the way you want them to be. Work on what you can, knowing that in the end you will be much, much stronger.
A team at a lower age bracket in Willowdale was going to be facing a pitcher from the Niagara area with an unorthodox delivery. I was the only one they knew who could throw this way. However, it must be remembered that I was not a pitcher.
This team asked if I could throw batting practice to them. I agreed, pitching to all twelve of their players.
The morning after the practice I couldn’t lift my arm above my shoulder. My muscles seemed as if they were totally stripped. There was no way I could even attempt to throw a ball. My doctor said that I had to give my shoulder complete rest for ten days to two weeks.
For two weeks, I had to watch our team play while sitting on the bench. Gradually my shoulder became stronger and I started throwing the ball. In order to toss it, I had to use other muscles than my shoulder. To maximize my efforts, I had to use them in sequence, starting with the legs, to the hips, then the back and so on. When I got to the shoulder muscles, they were gently utilized, and then I flexed the elbow, wrist, and finally the fingers in order.
Through the weeks, the shoulder became stronger, but I found out something. Before my injury, I had been relying on my pectoral muscles for a lot of the force for my throws. While rehabilitating these muscles, I was forced to compensate by using other muscles I had not used so much. The result was that they became stronger. As the shoulder healed, it synchronized with the other muscles and the force of my throws became much, much greater. What were strong tosses became rockets. I was honestly afraid to throw to somebody with my full force if I stood too close. I could throw a softball over 60 yards without a bounce in a straight line.
The same thing often happens to sports teams. The star goes down with an injury and the rest of the team has to pick up the slack until he returns. When he comes back, the whole team is much stronger, because they were relying on him too much before.
If a part of your life is experiencing an “injury”, the purpose may be so that other areas may be strengthened. When the sore heals, your whole life will be that much better if you concentrate on where you can strengthen yourself until you recuperate.
So don’t moan that things might not be the way you want them to be. Work on what you can, knowing that in the end you will be much, much stronger.
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