The St. Marys House of Ill Repute

For the past couple of summers, my friends and I have produced a live Internet TV show called The Front Porch Show. You can find it here.
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLiC53KDbzs5u38Qliv7Wvg

The show features guests, music and advertising about St. Marys. However, one Sunday, one of the advertisers cancelled at the last minute. We had to fill the space with something. Although we never had to use it, I came up with this fun poem.

The St. Marys House of ill Repute

It’s where you wear your birthday suit

Just come on in and give our place a trial

We don’t really give a hoot

If you’re local or commute

We guarantee you’ll leave here with a smile

It’s twenty-four seven every day

And if you want to come and play

We will do all we can for you

We will do it any old way

As long as you’re prepared to pay

We take Mastercard and Visa, too.

You’ll find us on the Internet

Facebook, Twitter? Yes, you bet

You can reach us any way you like

We’re as discreet as you can get

We’ll treat you like we’ve never met

Come by bus, car or motorbike

The St. Marys House of Ill Repute

Is found on this town’s major route

Call us on your phone don’t hesitate

It is the best, there’s no dispute

Your satisfaction absolute

Call St Marys 284-8888.

Now before you put us on your list

The business really doesn’t exist

We want to see if you’re really awake

It was some fun we couldn’t resist

To give a commercial a funny twist

In order to fill a sixty second break.

So now we really have to go

We hope you enjoy the rest of the show

There are important things that we must do

But there’s one thing that you should know

We’re happy that you help us grow

That’s the end goodbye, so long, adieu.