My Best Gifts

I always get nervous when I give gifts. When I was growing up, my mother had no problem passing her judgement on what she received. She didn’t do it purposely, but it often hurt when she showed her displeasure. It made giving her something the next time all that more difficult.

I learned a valuable lesson when I was going to the University of Alberta about gift giving.

I was poor when I met Marion. We briefly dated for a few months until I moved away from Edmonton.

I had so little money I had to tell her that if she didn’t take me out sometimes, we wouldn’t see each other that often. Many of our dates were Dutch treats.

Still, I wanted to do things that pleased her. I had to be creative.

One time I wanted to give her flowers. I know many men who woo their women by swooping down to a flower shop and getting a dozen roses. Some will buy a single stem from a wandering seller at a restaurant. Oh, how romantic – and how predictable.

Marion got flowers from me. Hers were handpicked wildflowers from fields in Alberta. There was one other fact that touched her heart about my gift. I had allergies to the flowers I picked. I handed them to her with tears streaming down my face and sneezing.

On Valentine’s Day, I figured I should get her a box of chocolates. Having no money, I did the best I could. I bought a candy bar, gift-wrapped it including a bow, and handed it to her with a card I had made myself. Again, she was touched by what I did.

Having lived in Ottawa, I have seen many company executives with their trophy wives. They supply them with a lavish lifestyle, but just how deep is their love. It reminds me of my teenage years when the guys with the nicest cars often got the prettiest girls. How shallow!

In my books, love is greatest when it involves sacrifice. When you give until it hurts, then you are really giving. If you give out of a great surplus, with plenty left over for yourself, then that isn’t so impressive.

Many mothers get this. Their homes are adorned with crafts made by their children at school, pictures posted on a fridge that have more value to them than an original Picasso.

So, you may never get that wonderful $3000 necklace you saw in a jewellery store from me. What you will get is one that I personally made with beads from a dollar store. And if you see more value in the $3000 necklace, then you just don’t get it. You just don’t understand the value of what a real gift is.