Unconditional Love

Wow! This is an interesting concept. What does it mean?

Unconditional means just that – there are no conditions.

I give my love to you and I do not expect anything in return.

If you do something I don’t like, I will still love you.

My love will not come with any conditions. This means that you are truly free to do whatever you wish. There is no “because I love you, you will do this.” There is only “I love you.”

Is this kind of love possible in humans? I think so, but it takes a lifetime to prove. It will also be tested by many situations and difficulties.

However, and this is a really big however, the definition of love has to be carefully considered.

Are you really giving unconditional love if somebody physically or emotionally abuses you and you allow it to continue?

Are you really giving unconditional love if you don’t confront people with a problem that might stand between you?

Are you really giving unconditional love if you are not being honest about yourself to yourself and other people?

I feel that unconditional love is not something that merely states an act of the will – I will love you unconditionally and that is it! Too many battered spouses accept this form of thinking.

To me it is more than that. It is a result of a relationship where no weakness or strength is hidden; the happiness of the other person is considered and love flows regardless. Again, when I say happiness, it may mean practising a bit of tough love that will ultimately result in growth in that person.

And to unconditionally love others, you have to unconditionally love yourself. Often this is the biggest obstacle.

Let’s look at the best example of unconditional love that everybody can understand. It is the love that a mother has for a child. Occasionally the child poops his pants. The mom accepts this and in spite of the mess, continues to love the child. However, a mother shows love by helping the child grow past many of these things she loves unconditionally. She toilet trains the child. You see, it is not wrong to work towards change and a better relationship for both the parties.

Many mothers also breastfeed their children. Do you know of many teenagers who are still being fed by their mothers? I don’t think so. Why? There is a time for the child to be fed alternate food. She is being kind by eventually stopping breastfeeding.

The point I am trying to make about unconditional love is that it is only seen when something fails, but still contains all the aspects of love that want to improve the relationship. It is not sitting there and being treated like a doormat. It is very special and if you find it, don’t let it go.