Happy New Year

It’s the last day of 2008. It’s a time when many of us pause and reflect on the year and look forward to the next with anticipation. Some of us may even make resolutions.

One of the things I do is think of friends and send kind thoughts their way. Did you just get one? Don’t duck. Let it hit you! There, that’s better.

When you think of it, every day can be a new beginning – the first day of the rest of your life. Oops, that line has already been taken.

I am content. I don’t have all that I want, but I do have all that I need. I will still have my dreams, but my reality is very nice.

Thank you for all who have sent me comments on my blog. If you are reading this (of course you are, duh!), I wish you all the best and may you live this year in anticipation of all the great things that will happen in your life. If you believe they will happen, you may be right. If you believe they won’t, they probably won’t. So think positive and keep in touch.

Information

I think back to the good old days of getting information. I would listen to one or two radio stations. I could get fewer than ten television stations – only three when I lived in Edmonton. Telephone and letters delivered the rest of the news in my life.

I remember when I live on the Henschel farm in South Edmonton. I would trudge out to the mailbox about 200 metres from the house. I could have waited and gotten it when I drove in or out of the driveway, but I enjoyed the walk regardless of the weather.

If the mailbox was empty, my heart would sink. However, if there was news, I would clutch the letter. In the summer I would read it on the way back to the house, but when the weather was not so inviting, I would anxiously scurry back to the house. Then I would settle into a comfortable chair by the window where there was plenty of light and take in each handwritten word.

There are times when I long for a letter like that – handwritten. The last one I received was from a guest at our bed and breakfast. She is a wonderful person who used to be an actress. She was actually in one episode of Star Trek. Rather than letters from a keyboard, each one is hand-crafted with a unique style. The author’s personality bleeds into the page. You can almost hear her voice in the words.

Today things are much different. And just like you, much if it is spam. When I look at the amount of information I have to process on a daily basis compared to the 1970s is astonishing. I often wonder if there is a saturation point. I figure there will be a time when the public will demand that everything slows down. Otherwise our abilities to form any reality will be fragmented so badly it won’t make any sense.

What do I mean? There are so many “truths” on the Internet these days that it depends on what you read that will determine your belief system. I see a couple of problems with this. One is the ability to check everything to see if it is true. For example, we have all had friends who have forwarded us junk mail promising us that Bill Gates will send us money if we only forward an email to all of our friends. If people are so gullible with this, how will they decipher other information on the Internet that might be a bit more important?

It almost reminds me of the Tower of Babel. All was going well until everybody started speaking different languages. It fragmented the people. I see this same kind of split with information. People are going off in all directions and they are usually doing it alone, much like at a fireworks display. One of the hard things is keeping up with it all. I feel like a hamster running in the wheel and it is turning faster and faster.

That’s when I go back in my mind to the long lane on the farm in Alberta and dream of getting a hand-written letter from home.

Start at the Top

It looks like the governments of the United States and Canada are going to send money to Chrysler, Ford and General Motors to help them survive. Doing so will guarantee employment for thousands of autoworkers. The benefits will be passed on to many others in their communities when they spend their wages.

In Canada, we are told that there will be conditions on the loans. I think I have heard the same happening in the United States.

Here is one condition I would like to see. Give the executives of these companies – the people at the top – a fraction of the money they made before. Better yet, pay them the same wage an assembly worker gets, and then give them a commission on the profits. If the companies loses money, they get the same wages as the rest of the workers.

One may argue that they are worth more than this. Are they? I could have done the same as they did for half the wage.

What kind of money are we looking at? GM’s top five executives make over $7 million in salaries. The top gun, G. Richard Wagoner, received a total compensation in 2007 of $14.5 million.

Is it fair for them to work for a commission? When I sold radio advertising, that’s what I did. It wasn’t easy. Anyway, aren't these people paid to run the company successfully?

Certainly agreeing to these kinds of conditions would send a message to the world that these people are serious about trying to get the auto industry back on track. After the three auto executives’ flights to Washington in private jets, I think their images could use some removing of the tarnish. It would also show tremendous leadership.

I remember when the Ottawa Senators was in a financial crisis. The team looked as if it might fold and it was late in paying the players. The captain, Daniel Alfredson, instructed the management to pay the rest of the team before him. If there wasn’t enough money to pay him, then the team could reimburse him when it had the money. It was one of the classiest acts I have ever seen in sport (take note Don Cherry and Alfredson is Swedish).

I think the leaders of the auto industry need to follow this example. In fact, there should be a few other industry leaders who should take note.

Perceptions

I didn’t think of him as being like that. And I didn’t think of her as being rude. Yet in the last week I have heard two comments about people I know that I wonder how the person who made the comment got that impression.

Do these people who don’t like my friends have it all wrong? I don’t know. Perhaps their reasons they feel the way they do are perfectly valid. I might even be having the wool pulled over my eyes by the very people they are talking about. Who know, maybe something has happened in their lives that give them such a different opinion.

You know what? That’s what makes life interesting. If everybody agreed with everything everybody said, things would be very boring.

What is important is to learn how to agree to disagree.

My brother, Barry, is a good example. We grew up with the classic case of sibling rivalry. There are many topics that he and I disagree on. When we get together, we often start discussions that can become quite heated.

All this being said, if I ever needed something, I know I could count on him to help. I hope he feels the same about me.

People are going to have feelings about everything. Having walked a different path than I, chances are they are going to be different than mine. That’s OK. It’s fine for them to have different opinions than I do. I have the right to have my beliefs. You can think I am crazy for them. I can’t tell you how to think. I can only be responsible for how I react.

So, how do I feel about these people who feel that two of my friends are not trustworthy? I accept their opinions and the right to have them. I may not agree with them, but I trust that circumstances will arise where they will see another side of these people they don’t respect.

My life is like a garden. I can choose to sow seeds that produce bitter fruit or sweet fruit. I can leave it unattended and let the weeds run rampant. Or I can maintain it faithfully, learning from the changes of the seasons and making adjustments according to what life throws at me.

However, getting upset at every person who doesn’t agree with me isn’t going to make me happy at all. There are so many people who don’t view things the way I do. Embracing and welcoming these differences will mean a more joyful existence.

The Blizzard

I really don’t like winter. I prefer summer any day.

Compare casually strolling out to my front porch watching a river float by to having to put on layers of clothing before I dare set foot outside into the cold.

But it is not the difference in temperature that is the main problem. It is the snow. Actually, it is not the snow. I don’t mind it that much. It is great for skiing in and building snowmen. What I dislike so much is what I have to do with it.

In the summer, I have to cut the lawn. However, I decide when I am going to do it. I can delay the task a day or two and it really won’t make much of a difference. Not getting cut so often might actually be good for the grass.

Snow is different. While the grass gently whispers to me, snow shouts. It says, “Come on out and shovel me or you won’t be able to get where you want!” I can be called to perform my duty any time of the day. Blowing snow first thing in the morning isn’t what I would call easing into the day.

But that isn’t the whole story. We had a blizzard on Friday. I waited for the snow to stop falling. Then I cleared the driveway and porch. Even with my snow blower, it took me over an hour. Guess what? It snowed again on Saturday and I had to go through the same process all over. Guess what again? Yes, a new layer of the white stuff is on the driveway. Fortunately, there isn’t enough to get worried about, but there is no guarantee that I won’t be welcomed tomorrow morning by another invitation to go outside to work.

I often look at situations in life and try to figure out what I can learn from them. Canadian winters have taught me plenty. The lesson here is that there are some things that you have to do without knowing if the fruits of your labour will result in the desired outcome. Sometimes circumstances ignore all of your efforts and take you back to the starting gate.

Sitting inside my house and just leaving the snow is not an option. Neither is doing nothing about the difficulties in life. I have get out there and get on with the job. If something else comes up, I have to deal with that too.

Why do I keep on doing this? Because I know that spring will eventually come. The warm air will melt all that remains and I will bask in and appreciate the warmth of better times. Meanwhile, there are things that have to be done now, despite the obstacles. Life is still meant for living, it is just a bit more difficult right now. Not to worry, it is only four months until April. And in my life, I am confident that plugging away will eventually lead me to better things.

Now, if you pardon me, I have to go check to see if it’s snowing.

Love and Respect

I just finished this book by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. It talked about the relationship between men and women in a way I had never heard before. Here is the short version of what it says.

Women need unconditional love from men. They need to know that no matter what, they are loved in so many wonderful ways.

However, the book states that unconditional love is not what a man needs. As the subtitle puts, what he desperately needs is unconditional respect. The book goes on to define what that means.

Eggerichs feels that many marriages fail because the woman fails to get the love she needs, while the man doesn’t get respect. Since the woman needs love to give respect and the man needs respect to give love, the result can be an endless cycle of conflict and needs not being met.

The book gave me lots to think about. It provided a few insights I had never realized.

What if he doesn’t deserve a woman’s respect and what if she doesn’t deserve the man’s love? That is where Dr. Eggerichs hits you with the word unconditional. Unconditional is a difficult word. His reasoning of its importance is that if you wait for the other person to supply what is needed, nothing will happen.

What I liked about the book was that it wasn’t too severe on either sex. It was gentle in instruction, but laid out the groundwork clearly.

Of course it was easy from my point of view to see all of the areas where women just didn’t get it. I’m sure a woman would have a field day with all of the areas where I am found lacking. The part that hit me between the eyes, though, was when he talked about women giving men unconditional love, figuring that it was what men needed because women need it so much. According to the good doctor, it is not what men need so much at all. Respect is the answer.

Interested? Go here and check it out - http://www.loveandrespect.com. Not interested? No problem, and if you have no problems whatsoever in your relationships, you should be writing a book.

Peace On Earth

I don’t have the answers, but I have a lot of questions.

I have friends who are very much anti-war. Many Canadians question our role in Afghanistan and strongly demand that we get out.

Now, here are the questions.

If we leave Afghanistan, the Taliban will almost certainly take over. The rights of women to get an education and lead a normal life, something beyond being a means of reproducing children, will be gone. Many, many people will be forced against their will to conform to a standard that is quite extreme. Are we willing to sit around and do nothing and let this happen?

In many parts of Africa, people are being killed by bands of rebels. Women are being raped. Children are being forced to be soldiers. Are we willing to sit around and do nothing and let this happen?

I find it amusing that during the Olympics protesters were picketing against the restriction of freedoms in Tibet. I think many people in Afghanistan and the Congo would consider it a privilege to live in Tibet. Where are all of the protesters against what is happening in the Congo?

Should we enter into a conflict to try to defend the defenceless? What if somebody was attacking members of your family? Would you sit idly by and refuse to raise a hand if doing so would stop the aggression?

How much do we embrace peace when it may not include justice? Yes, I have many questions, but few answers. However, I have yet to hear from those who oppose war as to what they would do against injustice against the defenceless in the world. Or would they idly sit by while innocent people are being massacred?
How would I feel if I was being attacked unjustly and those with some real power stood idly by and let it happen?

I sometimes wonder if some Ghandi-type figure might emerge. My guess is that in today’s world, he would be assassinated long before he could accomplish his mission.

The closest I have come to having hope for solution to the violence in the world was contained in the book, Three Cups of Tea. Perhaps education is the way to defeat the ignorance in the world.

But, as I said, I have many questions, but few answers.

My New Christmas Tradition

There has been more than one Christmas that I almost spent alone. One was in Edmonton, the other in Ottawa.

On both occasions, I dropped in on people around mealtime, hoping they would see the obvious – that I had nowhere to go.

I know how much I appreciated being with people on Christmas Day. I can live without getting any gifts. With seven older brothers and sisters, I have received enough gifts to last me a lifetime. However, I can’t imagine anything lonelier that sitting down to an ordinary meal alone. The love of these friends has touched me deeply.

For several years now, I have had a new Christmas tradition. I go looking for people who may not have anywhere to go.

A few years ago, we had the pleasure of welcoming into our home a Nigerian family, complete with five kids for our festive meal. They had never experienced a Canadian Christmas. They didn’t care for some of what we consider standard for our table, but what they did like they heaped on their plates. The father of the clan refused to put on the paper hat in the Christmas cracker until I reminded him that I was the head of the household and this was our tradition.

After dinner, we played Charades and a Nigerian game with stones. We also watched “It’s a Wonderful Life”.

The kids had so much fun, they invited themselves back, minus their parents, the next year. We had no problem accepting their invitation to invade our home again. The previous year had produced so much love and laughter. We did much of the same as before with a few new wrinkles thrown in. The result was the same.

Since then, I have asked people who I think might be alone what their plans might be. I am happy to say that everybody seems to have a place to go.

However, this year we will be hosting a former student of mine from Harbin, China. I am looking forward to the experience. It is wonderful to look through the Christmas experience through somebody else’s eyes.

When my friends and neighbours provided me with a Christmas dinner in my lonely times, I thought I was receiving something great. I found that when I am able to provide a memorable holiday for somebody else, I also received something wonderful. It is as if the love between the two parties meets in some magical spot and produces something special that is greater than the sum of the two parts.

There are a few days left before Christmas. Why don’t you look for somebody to invite into your home? If you find somebody, you will never regret it.

Financial Crisis

It is no secret. Countries in the world are scrambling to turn around the recession.

In Canada, we have been told that the way we regulate our financial institutions has left us better off than many, including the United States. However, I don’t believe for one moment that we are doing all that we can.

During World War II, England formed a war cabinet that was made up of representatives of all parties. Why aren’t we doing the same to tackle the foe?

What has happened in the past couple of weeks in Canada has done little to give confidence to Canadians that our elected members of Parliament are doing their best to solve the financial crisis.

To start, the Conservative government, which doesn’t have a majority, proposed some budgetary measures without testing the waters first. This caused a revolt in Parliament. The opposition parties ganged up and have talked of asking the Governor General to let them lead the country. Under ordinary circumstances, I would have no problem with this. Unfortunately, Canada is anything but an ordinary country.

To start, the coalition that plans on overthrowing the Conservatives requires the support of the Bloc Quebecois, a political party with the sole intent of having Quebec leave the country. In fact, the one part of the Conservative budget that irritated the other parties so much was doling out money to all the party coffers based on the votes they received in the last election. Yes, in Canada we actually pay a political party that wants to destroy the country. We are so accommodating and fair that we spend taxpayer’s money to work against ourselves. Amazing!

The other interesting fact is that until yesterday, the person who was destined to lead the country as Prime Minister was Stephane Dion, the Liberal leader who was rejected by most Canadians. The plan was to have him as the chief for a period of six months or so until a new leader of the Liberal Party is chosen. Pinch me! Does this sound like a strong plan to defeat the economic woes of the country?

The reality is that this is more about the hatred the opposition parties have for Stephen Harper than their love of Canada. Unfortunately, Harper has offered few olive branches to them, unlike President Elect Barack Obama who appears to be getting the best people to do the job regardless of whether they are former foes.

So what do we do? Do we allow the coalition to form the government and divide Canadians? Don’t forget there are many who voted for the Conservatives, particularly in provinces like Alberta, which has hinted at times it might be better off outside our confederation.

To me, the only solution is for all parties to seize the moment and work together and attack the problem, not the people. We elected a Parliament. Now get together and start working. Let’s quit the politics and roll up our sleeves and get cracking.

The Shouldice Hospital

I returned this weekend from the Shouldice Hospital in Toronto. It is unique. Since the mid-40s, it has performed only hernia operations. It is one of the best facilities of its kind in the world.

Because it only has to concentrate on one type of operation, it is very efficient. Operations are performed there like clockwork. You might think that this assembly-line type of approach would be dehumanizing, but it has an opposite effect.

Since they only do one type of operation, they are very efficient. The patients are happy and confident that the job is going to be done well. The success rate is over 99%.

Since all of the patients are undergoing the same treatment, there is a camaraderie that develops. They encourage each other.

It is almost a country-club type atmosphere. Meals are served in a common dining room. Waitresses bring you your food. My first meal there was tortellini. How many hospitals serve tortellini? I even saw one gentleman ask for and receive seconds.

The bedrooms are carpeted, which decreases the noise. They have a library, lots of newspapers and a piano and guitar for your enjoyment. Oh, and I forgot the pool table and shuffleboard table.

Things just go along so well that it leaves a positive effect on everyone.

Considering the other types of operations that are so common today, it makes me wonder why there aren't similar specialized hospitals for thinks like hip and knee replacements, heart transplants and other ailments. Putting all of your eggs in one basket seems to make a lot of sense.

It reminds me when I first loaded a film at a television station. It took me 5 minutes and I still did it incorrectly. In six months I was able to do it in 6 seconds. What I am trying to point out is that doing the same thing over and over can create such an efficiency that saves money. As long as the person enjoys doing the action, it only benefits everyone. And, as I said, having like-minded people together in one spot builds a team spirit that is good for everyone.

Edmonton’s #1 Resident

I had the great privilege of living in the Henschel home in Edmonton. They had sold their land, making them instant millionaires, and built a beautiful home on the other side of the Calgary Trail. Until the developer did something, they had the right to rent whatever they could to whomever.

It was a beautiful home, situated 300 metres from the road. A white picket fence surrounded it as well as some trees. Inside was a huge kitchen, thick wall-to-wall carpeting in the living and dining rooms and a custom china cabinet. Upstairs were three moderately sized bedrooms. All of this cost only $125 a month to rent, plus the cost for electricity and gas to heat the home.

It was also the home that was the closest to the southeast corner of Edmonton, giving it the lowest possible street address at the time. Thus, I was Edmonton’s number one resident.

There was one slight catch. There was no plumbing. The way I figured it, Reinhard and Alice Henschel had lived without running water for decades. I should be able to do it. And I did.

Getting up every morning was a ritual. Downstairs was a reservoir that collected rainwater. I would scoop it into a big pot and put it on the gas stove to heat up. I would then take my cup of coffee into the living room and read. Sometimes I would just watch the sun rise.

When the water was hot, I would pour it into the washbasin in the sink. Rainwater is very soft. I would take a washcloth and lather the soap and pass it over my body, starting with my face and working my way down. Standing naked in my kitchen, I had to keep an eye out to see if somebody might suddenly visit. Being in the country, this didn’t happen very often.

For over two years I had hardly any showers or baths, yet the rainwater gave me the cleanest of bodies and the softest hair.

Drinking water was taken from the well. Fortunately the pump had an electric motor. In the coldest winter days, I had to pour a bit of hot water down the pump to melt any ice that might cause the rod to snap. The mineral content of this water seemed perfect. On the hottest days, this cold liquid could slake any thirst.

The only problem with some who visited my home was the outhouse. It was a two-seater and I kept it spotless. A product called Mistovan kept it smelling nice or, should I say, kept it from smelling dreadful. Still some guests refused to use it. I remember spending hours preparing a meal for Tom and his family. They ate, and then promptly left. Somebody had to go to the toilet and was squeamish. I was not impressed.

It was a bit inconvenient trundling out there, especially the last thing at night and first thing in the morning. Winter was not so pleasant.

There was one advantage of potty trips in the winter, though. I never had to worry about constipation. On the really cold days, your butt would hit the toilet seat. The instant reaction was the tightening of all of your abdominal muscles and anything that was in your bowel would be exit like shot out of a cannon.

One year I had a huge problem. You know how exposure to the cold can give you chapped lips. Well, I had another area that had deep cracks in the skin. It was very painful.

I look back at that time with very mixed feelings. The rolling pastures that surrounded me when I lived in that house calmed the turmoil in my life at that time. I strolled out on many evenings watching the sun descend and the stars appear. The only sound I heard was the wind. I was able to find refuge from the world surrounded by three hundred acres – a buffer zone from the rest of the world. At times I long to go back to that land. The only problem is that, like most things these days, time changes everything. The land has been developed and from what I see on Google Earth, the house is no longer there. However, it is still strongly etched in my memory.