The Real Me

When I first started supply teaching, I hadn’t taught in a classroom of kids for several years. I tried being like the teachers I saw in the schools. It didn’t take me long to hate it and consider doing something else. I didn’t seem to be very effective and the kids really didn’t respect or like me. Hey, I didn’t like me, either.

Then I decided something that would change my attitude. I decided to be me, nothing more, nothing less. I wouldn’t try being what other teachers were. I would just be myself. If I messed up, then it would be me who would be making the mistake, not somebody I wasn’t.

The way I figured it, I could correct me. There is no way I could correct somebody who wasn’t me. Any growth that happened would be on me, not some other guy.

At first it was rough. I was still falling all over myself. I was shaking my head at the end of some days. However, as I analysed each situation as I drove home, I learned from my mistakes. I got better and better as the months went by.

Colleagues seemed to recognize my sincerity of being myself and offered advice, which I gladly took. In fact, the real me wasn’t afraid to ask for help. When I was pretending, that person I wasn’t didn’t want to be exposed as needing assistance.

The end result is that I can look upon my work as a process of developing my character rather than pretending to be a teacher. Most days are wonderful. I feel that I actually inspire students sometimes. Even the occasions that don’t go so well still work out for the good.

Am I like all of the good teachers out there? I hope not! I am me and there is no need to compare. My best is good enough.